Where I stand

It's a nice night.  The stars are out, and I can see em clearly where I am.  The air from the storm is fresh and I'm getting plenty of it up on this roof.  And yet here I am, huddled with a laptop.  What does that say about me?

Well, let me tell you what's lying next to me, sheathed in its scabbard- the sword.  Reforged.  I dropped by Nick's today to pick it up...No clue where he is, obviously, and I didn't see that "Ellen" chick either.  But that's not important.

When I had it in my hands at last, I felt...odd.  This thing is just a weapon, but it gave me a strange sense of relief.  Like I finally had something I could really fight with.

Zero...Whether you were good or evil doesn't really matter.  You wanted the same thing we all did- to be free from that bastard.  And you died fighting for what you believed in.  I hope you can rest in peace, cause I'm gonna do my best to finish what you started.  (no, not the crazy bone fetish, the killing Slenderman!  geez)

So.  Here I am.  June Reynolds, AKA Konaa.  18 years old.  Orphaned by humanity's greatest and possibly oldest enemy.  Desperately searching for a way to kill that enemy, and if that fails, to protect everyone I can from him.  Heavy stuff.  To think I wanted to be a writer.

The weird thing is the thought that there are people out there who would miss me if I were gone.  That's...fairly new to me.  I guess I should tell you guys a bit about myself for the first real time, huh?

Growing up...I hated people.  I was always smarter than they were.  Why would I want to hang out with a bunch of guys who talk about the stupidest stuff, and who like running around outside yelling and tackling each other?  Best to keep away from them.  Who needs anyone other than yourself?

...So I thought.  Charming kid, wasn't I?  For the most part, people didn't really like me either.  Not only was I anti-social and rude, my sense of sarcasm was not at all absent in my earlier years.  This did not tend to endear me to people.

I'd like to note that this arrogant kid is hardly a specter of the past.  Look at my first few entries on this very blog.  Even then, convinced as I was that I was as good as dead, I still held this ridiculous notion that I was way smarter than anyone else who was being stalked.  I looked down on people.  Thought they weren't worth my time.  Even my parents, sometimes.

Hurts when you don't realize how much you value something until you've lost it, eh?

And fast forward three or so months.  Every experience I've had has brought me closer to those I've befriended.  It's only now that I know how fragile our lives are that I can appreciate them all the better.  And when I take what I went through, and know that others have as well...I feel like I understand other people for the first time.

In a twisted way, encountering the Slender Man has made me a better person.  Who would have guessed?

The road ahead of me is a dark one.  No denying that.  A famous sword doesn't make that any easier.  In addition, I have to protect those important to me at all costs...and do my best to save those who are already under his thrall.  Some (read:most) would say that's impossible.

But here I am.  And here I stand.  I'll make you prove it's impossible, if you can.

The Labyrinth

How was it?

Cold.  To start.

I wandered the streets of a city I couldn't recognize, shrouded deep in fog.  The layout...made no sense.  Streets seemed to change direction when I doubled back, and the entire place felt tense, eerie.  Of course, I only got to wander for a bit before the pain started.

I saw them.  Hylo, Elaine, Spencer, August, Nessa, Nick, Fiona...dead.  I saw it over and over...the methods of murder changed, they were irrelevant.  The message was clear: "You can't save anyone no matter how hard you try."

It hurt.  I'd never experienced pain like that before in my life.  I saw my parents dead...begging me to save them.  And I saw him.  There was always a shadow of him beyond everything I saw.  Watching, waiting.

I had no sense of time.  I kept fading in and out, really.  There were moments where I would get some relief, and then the pain would begin again.

And I could hear...no, I could FEEL something else.  A compulsion digging into the back of my mind.  To give in.  To accept inevitability.  To walk into his arms.  Those moments were the worst of all.  We aren't...equipped to deal with a mind like his.  He doesn't work with our reality, that much I'm sure of now.

I don't know why I never broke.  But...At the back of my mind, I still held onto one last shard of defiance.  It was nothing more than the knowledge that if I gave in, much as I wanted to, that it would be his victory.  That there were people waiting for me to get out of this.  And that I had sworn to fight him until the end.

I stood.  We were back in the city...me and him.  And once again my head felt like it was breaking apart, and that feeling returned.  Almost like he was speaking.  A bunch of stuff about how small I was.  I was in a prison of my own mind.  Sheer willpower alone would not save me. That no matter how hard I fought, I would never be a hero.

For the first time, I replied, starting with a laugh.

"You're right.  I'm no hero.  I don't follow any plan.  Nick's fancy schemes, Elaine's research, Spencer's...weirdness.  I just don't do well following their lead, or any kind of authority or rules.  So I'll give you a tip.  Don't make the mistake of thinking I follow the rules, ever again."

I stepped towards an alley.  He loomed forward, but I could feel confusion from him.  There was a pause.  "You wanna know what I do instead?"

"I cheat." And with that, I opened the Path of Black Leaves and dove through it.  A few seconds later, or so it seemed, I was awake in the bright world of ours.

It was a gamble.  I had no idea whether being on the Path would let me open it, but maybe being a proxy's kid helped.  Whatever the reason, I can use it.  Not that I intend to.  It's got an unfortunate side effect of making me dead.

Crisis averted, I guess...I feel absolutely exhausted.  But I can't lay low for now.  I gotta find Nessa.  Never a dull moment, sheesh.

I'm alive, everyone.  I will NOT say sorry to worry you because fuck you I just got my mind raped for a week.  You should be apologizing to ME.  That's right, on your knees.  Except not like THAT, cause, uh, that'd be a little gross.

Yeah, I got nothing.  Later.

I'm alive.

Better luck next time, you betentacled piece of shit.

hurts

no, no!  I didn't kill you!  HE killed you!  I...wanted it to be me instead...why couldn't it be me?  Why..?

you're...not real.  None of this is real.  but, so warm, the fire...

would I see them again, if I...No, I can't, they're- You're gone.  I have to...accept that.  please...

don't hurt her, let her go.  let them all go, why do you do this!?  Why!?  Just...take me, please, and leave them!  That's all I want, I just want them to be safe...

ohgod no, no, no!  it's not real, it's not real, Hylo, get up please, get...no, that's not her!  She isn't here!  Oh god, no, stop...STOP!

there's no point...no matter what I do, no matter where I turn, he's there for me.

getting colder...feels nice.  don't have to worry about anything anymore..

that's right, move on...

but...they're still waiting for me there.  can't.  Can't go.  I'm sorry.  No...I can't.

No...You won't break me.  You hear me!?  YOU WON'T!  No matter how deep into my mind you get, I'll defy you to my last living breath, you MONSTER!

YOU HEAR ME OUT THERE!?  THIS IS NOTHING!  BRING IT ON!

Not the optimal discharge but I'll take it

I'm out of the hospital, though not exactly..legally.  I was about to be moved to the psychiatric ward, but the day that was to happen, I was lying on my bed, alone in my room, when the power went out.  Call me paranoid (please) but I don't leave anything to chance these days.  I got up and opened the door.

Silence.  An empty hallway.  That was very strange.  Hospitals aren't very loud places, but there is ALWAYS some noise on the ward levels.  I didn't like the looks of this at all.  Gathering my things, I decided it was time for an impromptu discharge.

On my way down to ground level, I didn't meet a single soul.  That was the final confirmation- I would be in serious shit if I stayed there.  Out the exit I went.  That was last night, and I spent the night in an undisclosed location (the best kind).  I'm heading for Nick's place as soon as this goes up.

As for whatever that was...Felt like the Slender Bastard himself.  And that's his style, ain't it?  I would have liked to stick around for another shot at him, but I know that'd do no good.  I was lucky against the tree, and I'm not gonna throw myself against Slenderman until I have a way to kill him.

Right.  Nick, comin' your way.

Unexpected visitor

I got an interesting visitor today, to say the least.  About five hours ago the doc let me know there was someone to see me.  That was when that guy walked in.  The guy who attacked me in the forest, and showed up at the fire.  Here's a general description: Dude is tall and broad-chested, usually wears that brown coat.  He didn't have his sword or guns, obviously.  He's got black hair tied into a ponytail, and a heavy Italian accent.  English is definitely his second language, though he speaks it fluently.

I asked him what the hell he wanted.  He sits down in the chair besides the bed and tells me he was impressed with my "spirit" or whatever.  Apparently his group, CRUSADER, hunts down anyone who's seen Slender Man, cause it means they've been infected or whatever, and he uses us to anchor him to this world.  So we're basically all Harry Potter Horcruxes for Slendy (the last book has been out for four years, I'll spoil it all I damn want) except mercifully less British and without the power to alter reality.  Also if we die we don't come back- haha, actually never mind.

Apparently having the stones to charge Slender Man impressed him, and he wanted to come give me a gentleman's warning before he hunted me down and turned me into chopped meat.

This guy scares me.  Maybe more than Rhodes.  He talked of killing me like it..pained him.  But he made it clear that he was going to.  And I can tell he could.  His stance is relaxed, but has weight behind it.  There is a hard look in his eyes.  The man looks middle aged, and experienced.  And when I angrily pointed out that HE had seen Slendy too, he said that he'd just have to kill himself too.  Without blinking.

He's insane.  Why is everyone insane?

Oh yeah, and I asked for his name.  He was quiet for a few seconds, before answering.

"My name is Matteo D'Avano.  My rank, and duty, within CRUSADER is Hunter.  You may refer to me as that, for that is my life to me.  I am the Hunter of the dark and the mad, he who drags them from the shadows to face the light of judgment.  So, Hunter will do."

Hunter stood, gave me a respectful nod, and left, promising that my death would be as painless as he could manage.

Yep.  Interesting guy.  Determined, skilled, actually quite kind.  Completely batshit insane.

At this point meeting someone who has it together would be more shocking.

I never even stopped to consider it, since it was what I remembered.  But something didn't seem right about what happened.  The memory of it felt...Unbelievable.  I've been going over it in my head, and I realized one simple fact: There was no way I could've avoided its gaze.  But it came to a head when the Doctor brought back one of my knives, which had been found, with my blood on it.  And then I remembered.  Which hurt.  Like my mind was forcibly piecing itself back together.

I met its gaze.  That was what convinced me those wounds were from the roots.  Its roots never touched me.  As soon as I looked into those eyes I felt my body being ripped to pieces on its own.  There was a presence in my mind- I felt like someone else, no, someTHING else was in my head with me.  Then the pain started.  It was almost blinding.  There wasn't anything else but pain and fear.  It felt like something was cutting my mind in half, this burning, sharp sensation.  Before I knew it I had raised my hand and slashed open my own arm.  The Tree told me to do it.  I couldn't say no.  The mere idea of defying it was unthinkable.

Maybe it was the sudden, physical pain of the knife, but for whatever reason, I felt myself regain some control.  That was when I forced myself to my feet, tore away my gaze, and dragged myself towards it, molotov in hand.  I managed to throw it, and the Tree burnt.  But I don't think for a second that this is the end of it.  The damage is done.

Is it too late for me?  Even now, I still have this intense pain in my head...I barely feel coherent enough to type this out.  Am I going to be like Zero, a prisoner of his own mind?  I finally understand what drove him to do what he did...I can't even remember what those eyes looked like.  And I'm glad I can't.

Everyone should probably steer clear of me.  I don't trust myself.

Mother Nature can go fuck herself

So as you might have guessed from what Nessa had to say, it was not a straightforward train ride.  Unless all of your train rides involve supernatural monster trees grabbing hold of the train, forcing you to jump off and fight it.  If that is the case...I recommend taking a bus.

When the tree cranked to a stop, a strange fog crept over the surrounding track.  The forest nearby suddenly seemed a lot less pretty and a lot more...forbidding.  I could feel the same strange sensation I got from Zero's forest- the Bleeding Tree, again.  For a moment, I felt like this was it.  This thing had killed Zero, and now it wanted us, and of course it was US it was after, that's just our luck.

The sight of Nessa snapped me out of it, though.  She looked scared, and I realized that I have way more combat experience than she does- she was counting on me to get her out of this alive.  I didn't have time to be afraid.  I wrenched open a window and told Nessa I'd be right back.  This is called a lie, children, you tell them this so they don't panic.  I jumped out and saw instantly that a giant tree branch or root or whatever was sticking out of the ground and had grabbed onto the back of the train.  It didn't seem to have a very strong grip, which was the curious part...It's possible that it was draining the power out of the train.

I started towards it, when a smaller root burst out of the ground and nearly impaled me.  I dodged it but it sliced open my shoulder.  I began to run for my target, but the root followed me and wrapped around my shoulder, and started to contract, hard.  At the same time, my arm felt...weaker, somehow.  It was harder to move it, it felt almost like the life was being drained out of it.  On top of that, it was contracting harder and harder, I think it was trying to break my shoulder.  Well, if it did THAT I would've been fucked, so I resorted to desperate measures.  Pulling out the handgun I'd bought in DC (long story), I shot a fairly high-caliber bullet at the root.

Well, it bounced off, even at point blank.  Still, I could hear a tiny crack, like I had managed to chip it.  The root stopped moving, and I threw it off.  I could hear it snaking back up as I ran, though, so I guess I just stunned it.  Well, what works works, as they say. (I think I heard someone say that once)  I emptied the rest of the clip into the huge root grabbing the train, and although I don't think every bullet hit, it slunk off and fell to the ground.  The train regained power almost immediately and started chugging its way along.  I knew there was no chance I'd be able to get back on.  It was time to go out in a blaze of glory.  I turned and kept my eyes trained high- if what Zero said was true, looking into the Tree's eyes spelled madness for any human.

There it was.  Huge, imposing, the mere sight of the bark made me ill, especially due to the bodies inside of it.  It was just like Zero had described it- and speaking of Zero, his corpse was among those impaled upon the branches.  Don't ask me how the fuck that works- maybe it went back for the body, maybe it was just screwing with me.  If so, it did the wrong damn thing, cause the sight of his corpse defiled even more pissed me right the fuck off.

I hefted a canister of petrol and threw it right at the woody fucker.  It broke apart at the trunk and started to spill out over it.  At that point, about eight or so roots burst out of the ground and ensnared me, pulling me to lie flat on the dirt, the other half of my plan still in my hand.  It...hurt.  That's all I can really say.  All of those roots were cutting into me, squeezing me, and this time I felt like my whole body was weakening.  There was a crack and SOMETHING snapped, I'd later find out it was my shoulder.  I felt...compelled to raise my head.  I resisted it, knowing that it was trying to make me into Zero Jr or something by getting me to look into its eyes.  The roots started crushing me against the ground, and I almost blacked out then and there.

Then I died.  Yeah, it killed me.  The end.  ...PSYCHE!  Attentive viewers will note that if I died here it would probably be impossible for me to update this blog again and it would probably fall to that stalker girl of mine who hates punctuation.

Slowly, I managed to push back against the ensnaring roots (this is sounding like terrible slashfic.  that is to say, normal slashfic) and hoist myself into a position where I was on my knees.  It made the damn things cut into me all the more, but I ignored the pain and raised my right arm, throwing my other weapon- a Molotov Cocktail.  It burst against the tree and ignited the petrol.

Immediately, I felt the roots slacken their grip.  There was a strange sort of...I don't even know what to call it, it was a noise, but nothing like I'd ever heard before, and it sounded more like it was in my mind than my ears.  It made me think of...rage, and pain.  Looking up, I saw that I'd managed to set a small part of the surrounding woodlands on fire.  The Tree was slowly getting engulfed by the flames.  Getting to my feet, I watched carefully.  All of a sudden, two of the branches flew at me, burning, and wrapped themselves all around my arms, dragging me forward. I felt my skin getting burnt and cut and I was completely out of energy, I couldn't do a damn thing to stop this except dig my feet into the ground, which slowed it down only a bit.

Suddenly, the branches fell away as well.  I took another look up and saw that the Tree was completely covered in flames.  Slowly, the massive proportions of it seemed to vanish, as did the bodies and blood.  Soon it was a normal tree again, though still aflame.  I didn't have the presence of mind to think about what that meant.  All I could do was hoist myself against a different tree and watch the fire die down, and it did after a while.  I can't really remember it well.  Before I knew it, Nick was walking towards me.

He said, "Nicely done."

I gave him the best grin I could manage.  "Don't think it's gone for good.  But I hurt it bad, I'm pretty sure."  I started to feel a bit light-headed.  "You don't need blood to live, do you..?" At the time, this was a fairly serious concern for me, having just lost a ton.  I blacked out before I heard his reply.

And woke up in this FREAKING HOSPITAL!  This is just fucking insane, it's like being in prison.  The damn doctors have hardly let me move since I got in.  I HATE doctors.  Friggin' overpaid prison wardens, can't tell ME what to do.  Nick took my weapon bag back to his place, so I can't even pretend to be psycho and force my way out.  And he's BLACKMAILING ME to stay!  Never mind how.

Bright side: Nessa's fine.  I kicked the Bleeding Tree's ass.  All in all, I think it was a good day.

Today?  Not so much.  I'm in this friggin' place for a little over a week.  A WEEK!  HONESTLY!  You are a DEAD MAN w hen I get out of this albino deathtrap, Amalga!  Fuck doctors, fuck trees, fuck nature in general, AND FUCK YOU!

...alright, I feel better now.  That's about it.  Keep you posted.

http://clarioncall-h64.blogspot.com/2011/08/konaas-gone.html
~rise

Just a quick update

H, well, I guess she's revealed herself now, Nessa and I are still breathin', and we're heading out in a few minutes to catch a train.  Nothing really of note happened- we're still thinking of meeting up with a Sage if they'll see us, but that can wait for now.

Can't believe it's only been a couple of weeks...I still see the fire whenever I close my eyes.  But I can't let that stop me.  I can grieve when this is over, one way or another.

See you all.

DC

That's where I was today.  H and I came in and we met up with Hylo and Dysis for a day of fun at the National Museum.  We met up, it was all well and good, but sadly, H seemed to be a bit ill.  We took her back to the hotel, and...

I dunno.  She has these compulsions, I think she's mentioned on her blog.  They cause this bad shit to happen to her, like, she passes out and starts hurting herself and....I hate it, cause there's nothing I can do, it would seem.

Which is why I'm asking Nick, Kay, and Ryuu.  You guys know more stuff about this than anyone.  Are any of you willing to meet us and see what you can do for H?  Email me if so.

On a lighter note, something of a more personal nature happened at the museum.  And ...well. You guys can stop harping on us now, cause it's pretty official.  I mean, we kissed, that's more official than the fucking Declaration of Independence.  In fact this one in it's own right.  A Declaration of Independence from being single.

Love you, Hylo.  Hope I get to see you soon.

It's called the lady's room for a reason, dude

Not a long story today, but a serious one.  We're in Virginia atm, but we had an encounter a couple days ago.  While waiting at the deserted train station, H got up and went to use the bathroom.  And then she was gone for about ten minutes.  Now, I don't know how long it takes girls to use the bathroom, but it is not that long, I am almost certain.  I got up and curiously went to wait outside (dammit, I wasn't going to go in, stop giving me that look).

I heard a voice inside.  A man's voice.  Not just any man's voice: it was a soft, polite voice, with an edge to it.  Rhodes.  That was when I went in.  He was saying shit to H, I couldn't hear, but she seemed really distressed.  Well, as you all know, his deal is shoving stupid details into your face and digging up old wounds.  He was trying to psyche out H, and I wasn't gonna have any more of it.  I got him in the shoulder with a knife, then he rushed me and we fought for a bit.  DAMN he's fast.  I couldn't keep track of him for long, and I got a couple minor cuts because of that.

I had to think fast, and I figured that if he was so damn fast he couldn't be very heavy.  So I rammed him with my shoulder and sent him bursting into a stall.  I slammed it shut to buy a couple seconds, and we got out in time.

Lesson learned: Never go to the bathroom alone.

...wait, ew.  Never mind.  No lesson learned.

H's Blog

http://clarioncall-h64.blogspot.com/

She's part of this again, I guess.